the capturation


There is something so cathartic about listening to old school PJ Harvey very very loud. And something so rebellious about staying up way past a sensible school night bedtime (usually my weekday be-in-bed-reading curfew is midnight, but it just comes around so darned quick). Although Thursday night is unofficially the weekend. So I’m really only just getting started.

Things I learned today:

Mosquitos can dodge raindrops. No shit. They can actually navigate their way between them mid-flight.

I am quite gullible, no matter how hard I try not to be. (E.g. not long ago I nearly got tricked into believing there were vampires in Khandallah.)

I am not very good at fronts or ruses, no matter how hard I try to be. (Actually, I don’t try particularly hard to be at all. No point.) I am also a useless dissembler.

And that’s about all I learned. Not a bad day in the universe, all up. My universe, I mean. I wouldn’t be so presumptuous as to make a call on anyone else’s.

Best thing that happened to me today: Emma is making me a badge that says Dropkick Brownie. Because I was. (But with enough water under the bridge, even closely-held failures can come to be cutely personality-forming.)

Most interesting observation of yesterday: James tells me my blog is like melancholy Seinfeld. (That’s kind of like saying it’s like Friends with no friends in it, but I like it; I think I know what he is getting at.) I don’t consider myself to be a maudlin soul in any way whatsoever, but I suppose it’s true I do find the underside of things most compelling. I’m not sure why. It’s just more interesting.

This is my favourite Banksy mouse. I relate to it the most. One year I gave Simon a birthday card with this on it. I think he appreciated the humour/relevance (I gleaned as much from his smirk). Tonight we went to see Exit Through the Gift Shop at the programme launch of this year’s Wellington International Film Festival. I think I need to go and see it again. It’s doing my head in a bit. But in a good way. Banksy vs. Mr Brainwash/MBW. The whole artful artifice of the thing gets more complicated the more I try to unravel it. (But that’s a stupid thing to say. Anything gets more complicated the more you unravel it.)

Thierry Guetta is a beguiling mental carcrash of a character (and I use the word character advisedly and in its widest sense).

Obsessed with filming everything and doing absolutely nothing with the resulting boxes and boxes of video tapes, he says something about “the capturation” being the only thing that matters. The process of doing it. Not the thing the doing becomes. The tapes themselves are irrelevant. Like dust-gathering pages of an unfinished manuscript, perhaps. It was interesting, anyway. It made me think how I’m more at home just doing the making. Not the ghastly editing/post-production and splicing together part.

It also made me think of a conversation I had with someone last week who I hadn’t caught up with in ages. He said something about his tendency to look at everything in terms of outcomes, to want things finished, complete, wrapped up. He couldn’t just enjoy the doing for what it was, in the moment, irrespective of where and how it might end up. That whole thing about life being about the journey rather than the destination.

But would we undertake any journey without the promise of a destination? What if someone said: Off you go, then, but you’re actually not going anywhere. Take in the birdsong and the stars and morning dew, but just remember you’ll never end up anywhere other than right where you are. That would be quite an undesirable situation, to me at least.

What if you just wrote and wrote and wrote with no consideration whatsoever for the final form the writing might take. That’s just weird. But worth thinking about. To just focus on capturation for capturation’s sake, and leave the rest in the hands of a hopefully benevolent universe. There might be something in that.


2 Responses to “the capturation”

  1. “What if you just wrote and wrote and wrote with no consideration whatsoever for the final form the writing might take” – you know it’s not that weird. I can certainly (obviously) relate to this…

  2. 2 James

    I enjoyed the mention, big bird.

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